New Name Needed, Apply Within

More complaining about the cold weather today. Yes, it’s repetitive and boring, like a televised bowling match. But I stand by the writing advice of “write what you know,” and boy do I know cold weather. We’ve lived together so long that we might be considered married by common law.
Anyway, today’s severe weather alert from the National Weather Service warned of dangerous wind chills for yet another night. But this bulletin threw a curveball:

THOSE PLANNING TO VENTURE OUTDOORS SHOULD DRESS IN LAYERS…

Venture? Venture? We’re talking about going outside, not trekking through the jungles of Zaire. When did going outside become a life-or-death decision?