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Danceonia

June 22nd, 2004

Whenever I’m feeling down and depressed, I like to imagine that I’m the king of a very powerful country, only the power comes from my citizenry’s advanced dancing abilities, and whenever I send them off to war it is really a dance war, and we are always better dancers and therefore the victors, and before I feed the losers to the alligators I tell them what a good job they did.

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  1. June 22nd, 2004 at 12:34 | #1

    Hopefully before you feed them to the alligators, you would tell them: “You got served!”

  2. June 22nd, 2004 at 12:37 | #2

    Actually, all my alligators wear giant rubber Ashton Kutcher masks and play prerecorded audiotapes informing the losers of their Punk’d status immediately prior to consumption.

  3. June 22nd, 2004 at 14:50 | #3

    If you forced all of the captured enemy soldiers to line up and do the macarena or the electric slide, would that violate the Geneva Convention?

  4. June 22nd, 2004 at 15:00 | #4

    Of course not. Nothing in the Geneva Convention prevents prisoners from keeping the weapons they brought into combat.

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